I’m writing this piece because I remember feeling like a bit of a failure when, just before her first birthday, missy started displaying, let’s say, assertive behaviour. Surely this wasn’t the norm? I thought kids weren’t meant to start having tantrums until they were two (isn’t that why they’re called the “terrible twos”?)! Of course, like all parents, I put it down to my child being very advanced, haha! But, in seriousness, I was not prepared for one-year-old tantrums. Googling the problem didn’t help. I couldn’t find a lot of answers to questions on one-year-old tantrums. I couldn’t find out what was normal. So, here it goes, here are our daily struggles with miss one-year-old. I hope it helps some of you going through the same.

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Demanding certain foods
I’ve said before that little miss loves her food. However, she has recently realised that she can be selective about food. She can refuse the delicious risotto we made her, and point to the cupboard demanding a “nanana” instead. And, sure, maybe some parents would give in to it. Our mantra at the moment is, “we don’t negotiate with terrorists”, which essentially means we’re willing to battle it out one spoonful at a time for half an hour before we give in and give her the friggen “nanana”. That 30 minutes is painful, it involves tears, screaming, more pointing, getting out of the high chair and eating on Mumma’s knee, getting back in the high chair, standing in the high chair and, on occasion, testing Mum and Dad’s reflexes by throwing herself backwards in the high chair. Maybe I should just give her the banana, but I feel the kid can’t live on fruit alone!

Related: Baby’s first words – a foodie in the making

Resisting the nappy change
This one’s recent, and it’s a nightmare. Recently, we went out with our mothers’ group friends. In this 90-minute jaunt, missy disgraced herself twice. That’s two nappy changes in public with a writhing child who wants to crawl away. At one point two of us were holding her down while I tried to wipe her and put her nappy on as soon as possible, my friend kindly pointing out when I missed a spot due to madam’s vigorous kicking. It’s an absolute nightmare. You would think I was torturing the child. The alternative is to leave her sitting in her own filth, so there’s no way around this one.

Refusing to get in the pram
All of a sudden missy hates getting in the pram. Oh, sure, she loves the walk once we get going, but getting her in the pram is a challenge. This morning putting her in upside down for a laugh sated her enough so we could get her in the right way around, but not before she spent five minutes arching her back and laughing as we tried to get her in the pram, before turning her comedy routine into a massive strop. My way around it is to shove a dummy in her mouth to relax her, and then remove it the moment I have strapped her down, but it’s not my ideal negotiation technique. Unfortunately, I’m yet to find an alternative that works.

Holding onto toys
I can only assume this recent possessiveness is a result of childcare. All of a sudden missy doesn’t like sharing, in fact she will pull whatever is in her hand swiftly to her chest and practically hiss at you if you try to take it away from her. She cries whenever another child dares to go near her toys, food or pram, and she’s been known to snatch from other children. The worst is when mum dares to remove something from her clutches when we’re getting dressed – tears flow readily, screams abound, the one positive of it is it’s the one time I get a really good look at her gums, which helps with predicting the next round of teething tantrums. Oh, what fun!

Related: The first hour of the first day I left my baby in childcare

Responding to “no”
This is self-explanatory, the kid doesn’t like being told “no”. She has a mind of her own, and she won’t be told what to do! My most recent memory of a “no” tantrum was missy wanting to touch my bottom in the shower. When I didn’t let her do that all hell broke loose! It’s hard not to completely lose yourself laughing in that situation.

Here’s hoping these early tantrums mean we escape the “terrible twos” – yes, I’m aware that’s ridiculously optimistic, but a mumma’s gotta dream!

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