Dear baby,

No, I haven’t neglected to write for three weeks. It appears that I miscalculated – who was to know they count your due date from your last period, rather than from conception? Anyway, it appears that we are now in week six, rather than week four. So far, so good.

Today, the doctor confirmed that you’re on your way and you and your Mum (aka me) are healthy. Apart from the daily nausea, I feel fine. And your Dad is being more attentive than ever – I wouldn’t have known it was possible! That said, I may have cursed you several times over the weekend as bottle after bottle of lovely wine was opened over Christmas, without a sip from me. It was very out of character!

I told your Gran and Pa on Christmas Eve. I did it by writing them a Christmas card that ended, Lots of love, Carly, Chris and Sweet Pea. Your Gran screamed! She seemed so very happy. I actually think she questioned my reaction as she did ask me later if it was good news. It’s funny though, it’s hard to get excited when all you’re doing is thinking about the changes your body is going through, cursing yourself for not being capable of falling to sleep on your side (you try sleeping on your stomach with boobs that feel like rocks and hurt like you’re a budding pubescent girl) and wondering what you have to do next! It’s very strange. I think it feels even stranger for your Dad. He doesn’t feel the changes in my body, so for him there’s no sign of you at all, except when we go out for dinner and your lightweight Mum is ready for home at 9.30. I never realised how much caffeine and alcohol kept me going!

So, next steps after today is blood tests at nine weeks, until then it’s just you and me, kid. Please, please, please don’t make me sick! I’m so nervous about keeping it from people at work. I know it’s ridiculous, but I fear telling people too soon will restrict my career. And I know I’ll be Mum first, but my career has always defined who I am, and I’m not quite ready for that to change. At least I have a few days before the masquerade begins again (it’s currently the downtime between Christmas and New Year).

Anyway, now I’m just sitting here, writing, while I wait for your Aunty J to text us back so we can tell her the good news. We told your Uncle J and Aunt S. Uncle J was unsurprisingly nonplussed about the whole thing. Don’t get me wrong, he’s excited, but he doesn’t exactly bubble with excitement with things like this, you know what he’s like. Aunty B, on the other hand, was very excited. I think it’s nice that you’ll only be four months apart from your little cousin. We also told your cousin A, but at age two I’m not sure she really understood. She kind of looked at my belly, didn’t see a lot going on there, and frowned.

Next: Week 7

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