The pregnancy – Week 15

Dear baby,

Fifteen weeks! Wow! You’re getting bigger, and so am I! This week I had two vomit-free days. Huzzah! Of course, some of the other days were still disgusting, one so much so that I had to take time off work. But, I’m hoping we’re progressing.

This week we got the results of our final tests and have been told that everything is going OK. You’re in good condition. I can’t tell you what a relief it is just to know that everything is OK. I think I couldn’t help but worry about how you were doing in there.

I swear I’ve been feeling you move this week. I had a couple of days there where it felt like bubbles were running through my belly. Quite a funny feeling. My doctor tells me it’s too early to be feeling things, but I’m not so sure. Of course, I googled it – first thing you have to do, right? I read that lots of small-framed women feel it sooner. And, at the moment I’m still small-framed! Or maybe I just want to feel you and it’s all in my head. I actually can’t wait for your Dad to be able to feel you kick.

Related: Peeing on a stick

This weekend your Dad and I went up to Venus Bay for a weekend with the family. It was your Gran’s birthday celebration so we all head up there for some relaxing time. Your Aunty B is only six weeks away from having your cousin. Of course, she looks fabulous. I think I’ll be twice the size of her!

Anyway, at one point in the weekend your uncle started making broad racial generalisations. I don’t want to get into specifics – that just gives him airtime I don’t think he deserves. It made me so angry. I fought with him, and then tired of it. What’s the point? He’s going to traffic racial stereotypes no matter what reasonable argument I make. I ended up going to bed early just to avoid the conversation. It got me thinking about what kind of person I want you to be, about what kind of environment I want you to be exposed to. I can tell you right now that if you were in that room I would have left earlier, with you in my arms. I would have left earlier and explained to you why making those kind of statements is ill-informed and wrong. I can see that there are going to be some things that are going to be hard to keep from you. But if I can bring you up to be kind, to be open-minded, to understand the plights of others, to listen to people, to try and be understanding, then I think I will have done a good job. I will do my part to make sure you are exposed to a whole world of experiences so you don’t build prejudice based on ignorance.

I know that you will be wonderful though. I do. I may not always have been a wonderful person, I may have been ignorant myself once. But your father is a wonderful person. He is one of the kindest, most understanding people I know. Sure, he’ll joke, sure, he’ll sometimes act like he’s more ignorant than he is, but in his soul he is kind, and I know that you will be too.

Next: Week 16

Previous: Week 14